As I have been travailing on my mission, I have realized what it truley means to "serve" a mission. When I first decided to serve, I had no outlook on the outside world as well as what life in the gospel really has to offer. I had the great privilage to listen to Elder Oaks speak to all the missionaries on the 22 of May. He said many and great things which I will not emphasize at this moment, what I want express is what Sister Oaks talked about before Elder Oaks spake. She said, "Elder Oaks has come so you may recieve personal revelation from an Apostle of the Lord. Revelation may not come from the words he speaks, but from the feelings you recieve." Although many things he spoke did have a large impact on me, and I was seriously moved by his words; what struck me the most is the feeling I recieved. In Enos verse 6, also in Mosiah somewhere, there is an account where Enos as well as Alma both were "struggling in the spirit." When Elder Oaks spoke, I was struggling in the Spirit. I had compassion for Elder Oaks, he himself told us a joke that we should be gratefule that after our missions we will return to "civilian" lifestlye, but that his calling ends the day he dies. An apostle of the Lord can laugh and devote his whole life to the building up of the Church upon the earth until the day he dies. This is truley cosecrating his time to the building up of the church on the earth. My thoughts afterwards were of desire. What is life's purpose? Is in not to build up the kingdom of God? As coming from the Liniage of Ephriam as many of us are, is it not our obligation as well as our life's calling to build the church and bring those to the gospel of Jesus Christ? This thought, for a moment, was very somber. I want to be worthy to be God's instrument. I want to be able to share the gospel to all those who live on this earth. Now when I entered the MTC, I realized my calling more fully, "to put away childish things, and to become a man." (I think 1st Corintians) As I entered the field, the "dimension of missionary work" has made manifiest of applying my lifestlye of the Gospel to others. And now when I heard Elder Oaks talk 2 days ago, the "dimension of missionary work" has once again changed. It isn't about "Just doing missionary things," it is doing missionary work. I understand now why we are given callings, it is because God trusts us. In fact, if God calls you many times in your life, how would you FEEL? Honored? For me it would be humbled. Humbled to know that I am trusted by the Lord to do his ministry and work upon this earth. Elder Oaks talked what a name means. A name isn't just a lable, it is the essence of who we are. When Saul was converted, when Abram was chosen, their names changed to Paul and Abraham. This is because their lifestyle was in accordance with the Gospel of Jesus Christ and that their outlook in life is changed into another Dimention of Missionary Work. For me this is true, my name will not nessicarily change, but indeed my essence already has. I toil in the spirit, to know which way to turn, I desire to be and represent Jesus Christ the savior of the world. The gospel isn't jsut about being baptized, reciving the Gift og the Holy Ghost and going to the temple and getting married and enduring to the end, it is about doing so, and doing more, doing what the Spirit wants. To convert the world and fulfill the porimises and convanants made in the Book of Mormon and by Latter Day Prophets.
This is my testimony that we can have this desire and love who we are because of what we stand for. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen