Tuesday, March 20, 2012
My weeks here at the MTC have been full of the spirit. I really had no idea how personal this work has become. I want all to receive this gospel. I sometimes struggle to understand that I am giving my heart, might, mind, and strength. I find myself not wanting to sleep, not wanting to eat, and not even wanting to take breaks because of how much I want to accomplish; similar to Parley P. Pratt's Book of Mormon reading example. I find it hard to not think of this work as a formula. That if I work, if I pray, if I fast, then I will have success. The Lord only promised that we will receive joy when we do his work. Therefore when I find myself not seeing the success, I usually relate it with because I am not trying hard enough. I have come to know that I need to rely on my lord and Savior more. I know that Satan makes you think "extremes" that if he cannot pull you away from the church, he will try to discourage you, he will try to make you think yo aren't trying as hard as the Lord expects, when in reality you are. My weakness is finding that balance, and I will FIND IT!